windows phone is so cute. look at how the face changes when you get messages
"aw you don’t have any messages, it’s okay you’re still special"
"oh shit you got a message you hella speical"
"holy fuck cheese on a ball you hella popular better answer these people"
did you hear about the italian chef who died?
he pasta way
he just ran out of thyme
here today, gone tomato
his wife is still upset, cheese still not over it
we never sausage a tragedy coming
ashes to ashes, crust to crust
there’s just not mushroom for italian chefs in today’s world
When I was a kid I thought your 20s were supposed to be fun, not filled with perpetual anxiety about financial stability and constantly feeling like an unaccomplished piece of shit.
That’s because it was fun for baby boomers and they basically gave us this impression it would always be like that, but then they ruined the economy.
So we have an Italian exchange student at our school. And he and I were hanging out and he saw a pony, and he tried to show me but he didn’t know what it was called so he just pointed at it and said “Look, the compressed horse.”
And then he just grinned at his complete understanding of the English language.
High School Fads, 1944
Ok so now I’m on the look out for lesbians with hair bows in the back
I just like how the bow on the left is a ‘signal and a chllange’ it’s like yeah, Betty’s been going steady with Tommy for a few weeks now, but let’s see if Ronny can step up his game before Betty becomes a right bow kind of girl
can i use ‘she wears her bow in the back’ as a euphemism now?
what even is this show
the deleted scene from american horror story: Coven